Lone ranger

A good friend said to me one day – it’s harder and harder to find friends as one grows older. I didn’t quite believe her until I realised that it was getting more difficult to find friends to travel with. Reasons were aplenty – from choice of destinations and activities to different levels of expectations with respect to lodging and service on site.

In my case, I love to travel to undeveloped countries to which a colleague asked – why do you like to travel to this sorta place? When it comes to accommodation, I am extremely flexible, anything works from room with shared bathroom to luxurious resorts – at my staying in budget hostels, a friend asked – why do you make life difficult for yourself? In terms of activities, I hike, I trek, I dive, I bike, I wanna try sky gliding, para gliding, para sailing, hot air balloon etc. basically anything and everything – at which another good friend said, people go on holiday to relax, you go on holiday to tire yourself out.

I have always travelled alone somewhat, especially during extensions of work trips, but I only started to really travel alone five years ago and I have never looked back since. I absolutely adore the freedom! I choose any destination I fancy, I buy air tickets at a whim, book hotels or hostels as I wished, plan or not plan in advance and I get to decide what time to wake up or to leave the comfort of my bed without having to accommodate anyone or anything!

Do not get me wrong, the fact that I love travelling alone does not mean that I do not enjoy company. I am convinced that we need to have the best of both worlds – there are some trips that are best made accompanied and others where solitude is a blessing (in disguise). In fact, out of my eight overseas trips last year, only two were made alone – one to Mui Ne, a beach four hours away by train from Ho Chih Minh in Vietnam and another to Europe which was a return-to-France trip that I needed to be alone for.

In 2017, I started out strong by travelling alone to Myanmar as the first trip of the year! And it was the best decision I ever made. When alone, I have all the time to think, to reflect on the past year, to rest my soul, body and mind, to read and catch up on all the books lying at home, to people-watch, to stare, gaze into nothingness and daydream. On trips like these, I (and my e-book) are my best friends! And in actual fact, I can choose to have company even whilst being a lone ranger. On past trips, I have made friends with fellow single travellers or with tour guides I met on day trips as well. In China, there is even a term for this – it’s called mutual “pick-up” (互捡) which I think is hilarious.

My point is – solitude (by choice) is not a synonym for loneliness. Travelling alone need not be boring. It can be all the more enjoyable and fascinating depending on one’s primary objective. And in some cases like the above stated, we can choose to have company even when travelling alone.

Personally, I will rather be in my own company than badly accompanied. In Myanmar this time round for instance, I noticed that all the fellow Asian tourists I came across were alone. I wonder if this is because most Asians would rather forsake the region to take long flights to Europe, like most of my friends for instance. I was once like that too. I only started travelling in South East Asia after being laughed at in France by friends to say that I did not know my part of the world as well as they! Hmpfffffff! No one will dare to say that to me now.

To a dear friend who recently confided in me to say that I have helped her see the light and realise that one can partake in the joys of travelling even when alone, I would like to say – there is no right or wrong; it is all but a matter of choice.

We all choose to be who we are, the kind of lives we lead and last but not least, the type of voyage we would like to partake in whilst globetrotting.

And we should all count our lucky stars for having the right and freedom of choice.